Little Instructions

Back in the day, when I was a wee lad, I used those little tear-away-by-the-day calendars. I was also quite a pack-rat. Which is why I recently found two consecutive years of these tear-away days in my closet.

One such year was a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Calendar year.... I'm glad I saved those. The following year I was given a Life's Little Instruction Calendar (Volume XI in case you're wondering), and I'm even more pleased that I saved these. Here are gems of instructions. Take 'em or leave 'em.

On Relationships
Really go out of your way to see to it that anyone invited to your home has a wonderful time --- Ask friends who they'd choose to play themselves if a movie were made of their life --- Write a personal note in every book you give --- Remember, even the most sincere apology can't erase harsh words said in haste or anger --- Take a walk in the woods with someone you love when it's snowing --- Unless you're at the beach, remove your sunglasses when talking to someone --- When conversing with others, remember you expose not just what you know, but who you are --- Contentment is found in relationships, not in places or accomplishments

On Yourself
Write twenty poems and have them bound in leather --- Buy an expensive bottle of wine and compare it with a cheap one; you might be surprised by which you like best --- Never underestimate your abilities. You are capable of things undreamed of --- What qualities do you most like in your friends? Acquire them. Practice them. Make them your own. --- Keep your mind curious, your heart pure, and your enthusiasm twelve inches taller than you are --- Your potential is determined by your dreams; your value is determined by your actions --- Wave at couples sitting on front porches --- Your mind is the muscle that most needs exercising --- Carry authority and confidence in your posture and voice --- Maintain a touch of mystery

On Growing Old
On your birthday, try something you'd do if your age were your shoe size --- Compliment all women with beautiful gray hair --- Don't die muttering "if only..." --- Leave precious memories alone and undisturbed; trying to relive them often results in disappointment --- Go back to the house where you grew up and ask the owner if you could just look around.

On Random Betterness
Support your local diner --- Winning is simple, take just one more step when all the others have quit --- Don't waste time trying to reason with a dog --- Don't hurry past beauty --- Be different. Be fair. Be first --- Carry authority and confidence in your posture and voice --- Don't attend every argument you're invited to --- Life is hard; don't get soft --- Be willing to attend to the small details that make the difference between "done" and "well done" --- To discover good, reliable people, undertake a difficult task with a group --- Don't weaken the power of future compliments by telling someone (especially children) he or she is doing a good job when they're not --- Be the reason someone smiles today

Currently Carrying the Most Meaning for Shawn (yes I enjoy referring to myself in the third person)
Having a good idea is like holding a quart of ice cream on a hot summer day; you've got to do something with it right away or all is lost --- The happiest you'll ever be is when you're working hard for something you really care about --- For somethings to make sense, you have to live a long time --- Learn to accept praise without suggesting you don't deserve it

A Musical Review: Altar Boyz

Since first arriving in New York, I’ve heard raving reviews about this off-Broadway show called Altar Boyz. This post is another such raving review.

But first a definition is in order, off-Broadway. I myself had a vague understanding of the word, but as I have learned, it has a concrete, simple definition. An off-Broadway show is a one in which the theatre holds less than 500 people. That’s it. Doesn’t mean the quality of the actors, sound, lights set, or any aspect of the show is anything less than fantastic. Because these shows are often in small venues, it requires the show to do a little less with sets and such, but the show itself can be just as entertaining as those flashy big staged shows.

Off-Broadway does, however, mean more risks can be taken. More risqué subject matter can be addressed. More absurd plots can be explored. Such as a group of four Catholic school boys, and a Jewish one, forming a Christian boy band, creating a show that is a completely mockery of Catholicism, Christian Rock musicians, and boy-bands. This is Altar Boys. In my humble opinion, it’s absolute genius.

As an audience member at Altar Boys, you are actually an audience member at the boy band’s final performance of their cross-country tour. Their goal is to spread the good word of God through their hip thrusting gyrations and tight vocal harmonies. At certain points throughout the show, they use their “Soul Searcher 5000” to scan the audience and see just how many souls they’ve converted.

They nail every hilarious boy band member persona: the ever-diligent leader, the obvious yet closeted gay, the Spanish conquistador of women, the recovering muscular alcoholic, and of course, the Jew. Each has a quite a back-story which is uniquely woven into the show.

With just a very talented four piece band on stage and the five vocalist/dancer, this show makes the off-Broadway community proud.

Old McDonald Wrote Some Music

It was my first day in Playland park. I was sporting a gondolier's hat, a red and white, vertically striped vest, black shorts, and white shoes. My job was to entertain. Walk up to people sitting on a park bench and play them a song. This was my job, six times a day for fifteen maybe twenty minutes at a time. This was my job.

By the end of day one it was already a tiresome burden. I had done five of my "strolls" and had one more to do. "I should just skip it," I thought, "who'd know?" But it was my first day. I'll just get it over with.

Across from the carousel of fast horses, right next to the cotton candy stand, was a man holding his daughter. Simple enough, walk up to them, play You are my Sunshine or some other crap and be done.

"Hey guys! Having fun in the park today?!? Care to hear a song?" I said as I forced out a smile.

"We'd love to sing a song!" replied the man, "How about Old McDonald?"

We began singing and to my surprise the man started throwing in some harmonies. Most amusement park patron don't do that. Once we got through a verse and a chorus I began to dish out the usual park employee over-excited mindless chatter.

"Nice harmonies you threw in there!"

"Well, I'm a musician, a composer actually."

With that phrase the entertainer-patron facade was broken, and I really began talking to this guy. Turns out he's a freelance composer in the area, is just beginning a huge project for NBC, and is in need of an apprentice. We exchanged contact info and two nights later I was in the car, listening to his CD he gave me, and getting lost on my way to his place in Yonkers.

I had no clue what to expect. Being mugged, raped, find out the guy murders Dalmatian puppies, or sells coke and only writes music on acid flashbacks... all were possibilities. Then again, finding a professional grade studio in some guy's basement and a stellar musician who writes great stuff and is quite successful was a possibility as well.

What I found was Jacob.

We've been working together ever since that first meeting. Three, four, sometimes five nights a week we meet and work on scoring this NBC pilot. Just last night we met with the director of the project on which we are nearing completion. He seems pleased. I've even had the opportunity to write some of the music myself, instead of just taking a back seat ride. I may even get some on-air credit for it. We'll see.

Blessings in disguise are interesting. Especially when you have to peal off many layers of the mask. And even then, the blessing staring back at you may be in the form of a short-haired Jewish guy from Port Chester. Scary.

A Musical Review: 9 to 5

A rainy Saturday is a blessing when you are in the amusement park entertainment business. We had one such glorious day on Saturday June 20th, and time away from the park cannot be wasted when you work six days a week. That’s why a group of us took the train into the city to see 9 to 5.

The show is written by Dolly Parton, which made me skeptical. I’m not the biggest country fan. However, I would barely classify this show’s music as country. It was musical theatre with a country flare and a huge flame of hilariousness.

Main character Violet Newstead, played by Allison Janney (may remember her from Juno, Harispray, American Beauty etc.), brings out her fair share of dry, sarcastic humor throughout the show. While Janney’s singing voice isn’t quite Broadway quality, it fits her part, monotone and strong. Perfect for the persona of a widowed woman in a man’s business world. Her acting, on the other hand, makses up for any shortcomings she may have.

The other main supporting actresses, Stephanie J. Block and Megan Hilty, were both part of the original Broadway cast of Wicked, and their unmatched acting and singing shown brightly. Hilty plays the seemingly bimbo-like secretary. As the show develops, so does her character, displaying a misunderstood office beauty. Block plays character Judy Bernly, a timid woman entering the business world after being left by her husband.

All three meet up and inadvertently take the CEO of their company hostage, resulting in no-so-cliché comedy, and a better work environment for everyone.

For a show that takes place mostly in what would seem to be a dull office setting, the sets were anything but mundane. Plus, the intense amount of dance and tight choreographed movement on stage is the same caliber as any other dance intensive show like West Side Story or Footloose.

Today was all around a surprising day. Didn’t expect to have off work, and didn’t expect to be so highly enjoying Dolly Parton’s country twang turned Broadway musical.

Intoxicating Jazz

I've come to truly enjoy Fridays at Playland. Not because it's the end of the week,(sadly, I still have two days till my day off). But because I get a chance to chill on the boardwalk along the Long Island Sound, enjoy the sun set with a bottle of wine, watch some fireworks, and listen to the elderly men of the Milt Gerver Big Band play the live jazz that I long to hear.  

Back in Stevens Point, WI, some of my favorite Friday nights we spent listening to the River Cities Jazz Band  as they entertained a mixed crowd of older folks, some 40 year-olds, and a hand full of college-aged jazz enthusiasts. The crowd on Playland's boardwalk, however, has mostly blue hairs and wrinkly skin. But you'd never be able to tell that by the movement on the dance floor. They are all shake'n like it was their first sock-hop. I figured this out not only by seeing, but experiencing it as well. 

A couple Fridays ago, my roommate Pip and I were listening to the fantastic band when a couple of ladies next to us were getting ready to leave. "Leaving so soon?" we enquired. "Well, we have no one to dance with!" they replied. If that wasn't an invitation to dance, I don't know what is. We took these young-at-heart ladies for a slow dance. I danced with Betty. The song was just about over. I could see some tears swelling up her eyes before she said, "We lost our dance partners a few years ago."  I almost melted as we finished our dance in silence because I didn't know what to say.

After that dance, our lovely ladies left. But I was quite pleased we had that dance. Put things in perspective.

A few of us cast members stayed till the night's end. As the band played their closer "New York, New York," our dance captain showed up the entire crowd with her high kicks and Rockette  style moves. The vocalist and band leader came up to her after the show and exclaimed, "You're going to Hollywood baby, no doubt about it," in his classic Brooklyn accent.

Indeed, I've come to love these Fridays. A night to take in life. 

What does America Run On?

I had no idea that America ran on Dunkin' until I started this journey out east. I was under the impression that all Dunkin' Donuts closed down long ago because a tobacco outlet now stands where the only one existed in Green Bay, WI. Apparently, Dunkin' fuels America everywhere else. However, they do not fuel me.

Carvel, on the other hand, took me on a wild ice cream ride that I've never been on before. Perhaps these do exist in the mid-west but I never had the pleasure until last night. The creamiest, richest soft-serve known to man.